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Frequently Asked Questions

Will you read my unpublished book/screenplay/poem/eulogy of Homer?

I’d love to. Really I would. But unfortunately, for legal reasons, I am unable to read unpublished manuscripts. I urge you find a critique group, a writing workshop, other aspiring authors at conferences, or kindly relatives to read your manuscript.

Will you blurb my upcoming book?

As my writing obligations continue to increase, it has become more difficult to blurb. More specifically, to get through the ever-growing mound of advanced readers copies assaulting my night stand. However, I always want to help when I can. Please look at other novels I’ve blurbed or follow me on Facebook and Twitter so you have a sense of my reading tastes before you send. If you think your work is a good fit, please email my publicist and she will let you know if I can fit it in. I will not respond to blurb requests sent to me directly. Or sent by smoke signal. Those are inconvenient, given LA smog patterns, and I always get them wrong anyways.

Will you speak to my book club or library group?

Of course. Duh. You people are great. Please email my publicist to set it up.

Will you come to my book festival/conference/circus/charity ball?

If it’s fun and it fits in my schedule and we can figure out the arrangements, probably. Please email my publicist. Detecting a pattern here yet?

Will you contribute a short story to my anthology?

I am generally busy with competing deadlines, but you can email my publicist.

If I mail you a book, will you sign it?

Unfortunately, due to the volume of requests I receive, I’m unable to sign books sent in the mail. Plus, the postage is wrong or they got lost and next thing you know, you’re camped out on my front lawn with a picket sign. Who needs that? Check my tour schedule to see when I’m coming to a city near you. If I’m not headed your way, you can always place an order through the independent bookstores I’m visiting. If you call ahead, I can even personalize it for you. And I’ll draw a smiley face too if you want.

Will you mail me a signed photo?

No, but Justin Bieber might. Or Nick Jonas. Come on, people. Do you really want a picture of me? I’m not very photogenic anyway, so I promise you’re not missing much.

If I send you an email, are you really going to read it?

Absolutely. I read every email that I receive. And though I can’t always respond to every email that comes in, I always appreciate when readers take the time to write. You are the apple of my eye, the wind beneath my wings, the…oh, never mind. Just know I love hearing from you.